Reasons Why The Question “Where Are You From?” Is Offensive. And Not Offensive

Time and time again, some of us get the question, “Where are you from?” We might dislike this question, or we might not. It’s a matter of perspective, or rather how we’re feeling in a moment in time that we decide if we like or hate the question there and then.

Chances are if we’re migrants, immigrants, refugees, third culture kids, expats or find ourselves part of a cultural minority community (think an Asian Australian in Australia, an Asian American in the States, we’re much more likely to hear the question. So too if we’re some place where our skin colour, accent or hair style sticks out from the rest.

Sometimes when someone asks where we come from, we feel small | Weekly Photo Challenge: Tiny.

Sometimes when someone asks where we come from, we feel small | Weekly Photo Challenge: Tiny.

A while back I wrote a blog post on the different answers to this question. It’s a question carrying quite a few assumptions, a question I’ve been asked all my life as an Australian-born Chinese living in different countries such as Australia, Singapore and Malaysia. Sometimes it rubs me the wrong way. Sometimes it amuses me.

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Why Some Asians Are Hoarders. Versus The Trend Of Minimalism

Some Asians are hoarders. That is, some of us Asians like collecting things, accumulating things over time up until we struggle to find somewhere to put away all that we have.

Most of my childhood and adolescent life, my Chinese parents were fond of bringing things home even when we didn’t need them. Our house was always rather full – every shelf was never empty. I suppose I was partially to blame as I liked collecting some things back then too. But these days, not so much.

Some of us may have a lot of something. And that makes us tick | Weekly Photo Challenge: Shine.

Some of us may have a lot of something. And that makes us tick | Weekly Photo Challenge: Shine.

Hoarding is not only about collecting things, but it’s also about putting aside these things and not touching them for who knows how long, maybe for a few weeks or never ever again. Often, hoarding is about collecting things that we don’t really need or don’t have a use for, and over time these things can become junk to us.

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Reasons Why Some Asians Dress Modestly And Conservatively

When it comes to fashion and clothing in Asian cultures, modest and conservative styles are more acceptable. Skimpy, figure-hugging, translucent and transparent clothing tends to be frowned upon, or at the very least not the go-to look for quite a few Asians.

Modest dressing is my kind of style pretty much every day. But that’s not to say I don’t wear something bordering on the ‘wild’ side. Occasionally I do, and have no regrets even though I come from a typical Chinese background.

Dress modestly, feel like you're in a different era, a different person | Weekly Photo Challenge: Nostalgia

Dress modestly, feel like you’re in a different era, a different person | Weekly Photo Challenge: Nostalgia.

In a nutshell, for many men and women alike, modesty is about dressing in a way where we avoid drawing attention to ourselves and avoid inspiring sexual attraction. It’s also about our attitude and character, about being humble and reserved in the way we live our lives.

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Chinese Dining Etiquette: Table Manners And The Polite Art Of Eating

When it comes to eating in Chinese culture, there are quite a few dining etiquette rules one should be mindful of. It could be eating with a Chinese family at a boisterous Chinese banquet. Or it could be a more casual dining affair with Chinese colleagues from China over business lunch.

Coming from a stereotypical Chinese-Malaysian family, these Chinese eating customs surrounded me all my life. I’ve always found them odd to be honest, but always found myself sticking by them.

Strict table manners can sometimes make us feel on the sidelines. Chinese pasta | Weekly Photo Challenge: Edge.

Strict table manners can sometimes make us feel on the sidelines. Chinese pasta | Weekly Photo Challenge: Edge.

Eating around Chinese people with a traditional mindset is arguably an art in itself. More precisely, this tends to entail watching the way one behaves before and during meals together.

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Your Dreams Vs. Unsupportive Asian Parents: Finding Your Way

We all have passions and dreams, which our parents might not always agree with. In a stereotypical Asian family, artistic and creative dreams tend to be frowned upon, and we might have second thoughts about chasing them.

Writing is something I love. Seven year old me rushed home after school and wrote fictional adventure stories in my bedroom, and loved writing essays for English classes. These days after work, I write for this blog and work on my first book. But for as long as I can remember, my Chinese-Malaysian parents have never been keen on me spending time writing.

Sometimes the road to our dreams is a hard one. Kurt Hugo Schneider & Sam Tsui, 2016 | Weekly Photo Challenge: Narrow.

Sometimes the road to our dreams is a hard one. Kurt Hugo Schneider & Sam Tsui, 2016 | Weekly Photo Challenge: Narrow.

One can say Asian parents are harsh and narrow-minded when they rather their kids pursue one dream over the other. Others might say Asian parents are simply looking out for us.

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