Why Asians Don’t Say “I Love You” To Their Parents

Posted on 20 February 2014 by Mabel Kwong

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“I love you, mom, dad.”

That’s something we hear children and adults alike say to their parents in movies and TV shows. And in everyday life, of course.

Love is something that I will always treasure. Love locks on Southbank footbridge. | Weekly Photo Challenge: Treasure.

But funnily enough, be it in reality or the fictional worlds, the phrase of affection “I love you” is rarely uttered by Asians to their parents, whether in English or in their mother tongue.

I’m admittedly one of these Asians. Never once have I said “I love you” to the folks face-to-face or even over the phone. To me, it’s a strange thing to do.

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Why Some Of Us Wear Shoes At Home

Posted on 18 July 2013 by Mabel Kwong

Recently, I fleshed out a few reasons why many Asians tend to leave their shoes at the door and go barefoot at home.

In reality, some of us don’t share this love of taking our shoes off before going indoors. Some of us especially in the Western world don’t recoil in horror at the thought of stamping around our bedrooms and kitchens with our shoes on.

Me wearing shoes at home…at a mock home setting in IKEA. Photo: Mabel Kwong

There are legitimate reasons that explain why wearing shoes at home is perfectly normal behaviour for some. The notion that it is a cultural thing is probably the most believable one. Choosing to wear shoes at home is akin to just another everyday life choice or custom: some of us eat with chopsticks while some with forks and spoons. Some of us eat chicken feet and some of us don’t.

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Hi, I’m Asian. Come In, Leave Your Shoes On. Or Not

Posted on 20 June 2013 by Mabel Kwong

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When I lived at home and an odd job or two needed to be done around our place, my mum welcomed the likes of contractors, plumbers and furniture delivery men into our Melbourne flat.

When she opened the door, these Caucasian handymen and tradesmen always politely asking, “Do we take our shoes off?”

And to my utter surprise and disbelief, each time my mum cheerily said, “No, no, no! It’s OK! Come in! Leave your shoes on!”

Blue shoes.

This is because if I came home and stampeded around the house in my sneakers or slippers, my mum would give me an earful.

It is customary in many Asian cultures, and Middle Eastern, Indian and African cultures as well, to remove footwear before entering the house. Very seldom will you hear an Asian person telling you to leave your shoes outside before stepping into their house. I guess my mum is a bizarre exception, at least towards our visiting Caucasian acquaintances, and I will explain later.

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