Oversharing: 8 Things I Will Never Post On Social Media As A Blogger

Oversharing online is something some of us are guilty of.

It’s tempting to share a big part of our lives online these days without much thought. Social media is such an easy way to engage and keep in touch with each other. Think platforms such as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Linkedin, Pinterest, blogs and more.

For those of us who are regular bloggers, at times we might wonder if what we publish – or are thinking of publishing –  is ‘too much’ and relevant to our audiences.

To share or not to share ourselves with the rest of the world. Evanescence, Synthesis 2018 Tour.

To share or not to share ourselves with the rest of the world. Evanescence, Synthesis 2018 Tour | Weekly Photo Challenge: Lines

As a multicultural blogger, often I find myself being careful of what I say on this blog as the topics I write about are quite sensitive. In fact, I self-censor myself when I craft each post – some things I just will not publish online.

According to the Macmillian Dictionary, oversharing refers to ‘giving out an excessive amount of personal information’ and it’s generally considered negative and inappropriate. That is, if we share what isn’t normally talked about or share non-stop about a certain subject, it can rub others the wrong way.

All of us use social media differently for different reasons. For instance, bloggers might selectively publish their works on public blogs for a specific audience and reserve sharing personal occasions on private Facebook pages. However anything published on public or private social media platforms has the potential to make the rounds anywhere online – screenshotting and sharing is so easy and it doesn’t hurt to think twice about sharing our lives online.

The more reserved we are, the less we might share.

The more reserved we are, the less we might share.

What I Won’t Post On Social Media And Why

1. My job and where I work

Share online where exactly you work and for which company, anyone can look this up and come pay you a visit at work. For bloggers (who have a day job outside of blogging), that someone could be an eager fan. Or it could be someone who might have a vendetta against you, your published works or your beliefs shared through these works.

Some employers will insist on sharing your name and position on their website, believing it’s a good means to network. For some lifestyle and travel bloggers, their regular jobs might be an integral part of their blog’s brand and material.

On this multicultural blog and my personal social media accounts, I’ve never mentioned where I work or given a hint of the field I have/am working in. Though I don’t think people who persistently send me emails accusing me of being ‘a white worshipper’ will actually hunt me down in real life, you just never know. Aside from security, what I do for a living has got nothing to do with my writing interests. This blog isn’t a space for inciting judgement, hate and pigeonholing just because of someone’s choice of job which not everyone might agree with. One job worked doesn’t wholly define you.

Some of us are selective with what we share, and to whom.

Some of us are selective with what we share, and to whom.

2. My location in real time

Like the above, when you share real time whereabouts through Facebook check-ins, on-location photo tagging or live Instagram streams, there’s every chance someone can track you down step-for-step. Geotagging or attaching location identification metadata to social media posts is a subtle way of shouting ‘I am here now’. While location tagging has helped nabbed criminals in India, it can make it easy for others to follow your every move for the wrong reasons. I like my privacy and for the same reasons I don’t publicly talk about my day job, have never posted an online real time status update.

3. Very personal details

It’s common sense to keep personal information such as credit card details, passwords, residential addresses and phone numbers private to avoid identity theft. Cyber-criminals commonly use these details to impersonate you or get closer to your family and friends. Sometimes social media sites might also slip up keeping your information safe, case point the Facebook data breach incident that seems to have affected up to 87 million users.

Sometimes there’s a professional need to share these details online. A journalist might put up a work-related phone number on their online profiles so anyone with a story can reach them easily. A blogger might put up an email address on their blog so they can receive feedback from readers – and they might put up an email address along the lines of monkeyhello(at)mrwobbles.com so as to defeat web-crawling-spam-sending robots.

Some of us just ain't comfortable with sharing ourselves with the world.

Some of us just ain’t comfortable with sharing ourselves with the world.

4. An entire portfolio of works

The bigger your online portfolio, the more confusing it might be for others to get a feel of your craft. While a sizable portfolio can showcase a variety of strengths, you can come across as ‘trying too hard’. A selective portfolio often helps bloggers, writers and freelancers create a niche and find their audience. If someone is really interested in your work, they’ll make genuine contact to find out more about what you do.

The more you share your art and work online, the more likely someone might blatantly copy it without permission or attributed credit. It’s no surprise some bloggers install disabling right-click-copy-paste plugins in a bid to minimise content theft.

Over the years, what I’ve written on this blog has been copy-pasted on other blogs without permission. It really is too bad, too sad as not everyone understands copyright and copyright disclaimers. Over the years, I no longer put up original-sized, full-resolution photos and include watermarks over resized versions – and one time a government department contacted me through my blog to purchase an original photo and published it in a report  =D

5. Disagreements

Getting involved in gossip and slandering others online potentially leads to defamation, reputation damage and maybe even legal proceedings. To simply put it, drama makes everyone look bad. For instance, in 2017 a beauty blogger was ordered to pay her wedding photographer over a million dollars in damages after the former shamed the photographer online for charging additional fees – and this emotional rollercoaster played out in the media.

Sharing one’s opinion is one thing but attacking others is another. Badmouthing others doesn’t sit well with me. It speaks of taking sides as opposed to working together, and understanding each other’s differences is one of the aims of this blog.

Some of us will fear the uncertainty that sharing brings.

Some of us will fear the uncertainty that sharing brings.

6. Friends and family

Not everyone likes to have an online presence. As a blogger, your family and friends might not get why you blog and just don’t want to be a part of it. That should be respected if you want their respect and trust. Maybe they are shy or are extremely cautious about their privacy. This may come across as ironic on my blog since in many posts I make references to my family. These moments happened a very long time ago, and some have moved on or do not have a clue what the internet is and don’t want to learn.

7. Somebody’s secrets

Sharing someone’s secrets might make for an enticing blog but you might lose that person forever. When you share someone’s deepest confessions online, others might judge them negatively based on what you put up and like spreading gossip, you put their reputation at risk. After all, words and imagery are often open to interpretation and can be so easily twisted into a different perception than intended.

Sometimes things that are incredibly personal to us will be hard to share.

Sometimes things that are incredibly personal to us will be hard to share.

8. Romantic relationships

There are arguments for and against sharing romantic relationships online. Research has found couples share their relationships online as a way to express their love for each other, and they tend to be content together in the long run. However other research suggests couples who post more about their love life might be more insecure and unhappy about their relationship. Notably each relationship is different.

Naturally your romantic relationship shapes who you are, shapes your perception and so shapes what you do – to a degree shapes your blogging content. So it’s natural for some bloggers to mention or share their romantic lives on their blogs in some way.

Some of us might never be ready or willing to share. But we may try.

Some of us might never be ready or willing to share. But we may try.

This is not me at all. I’ve never fully understood how some can share photos and videos of their partners and children so freely, such as documenting engagements, weddings, births and family vacations on their blogs. Perhaps they want to share their happiness with the world.

To me, having a partner and people whom you trust is just too precious to share on a public blog read all over the world, even on my private social media accounts. They are beyond incredibly special to me; what we have is special and I like to keep them close. Because of that, no comment about my relationship status or anyone I’ve been involved with as a partner anywhere online.

*  *  *

For a moment, sharing might be liberating

For a moment, sharing might be liberating

As bloggers and online publishers, sometimes it’s tricky to draw the line between public and private, open and personal on our social media platforms. There are different degrees of what oversharing is, and what is oversharing to someone may not be oversharing to someone else. Sometimes our craft calls for us to share intimate moments online. For instance if we have a lifestyle or sex education blog, chances are we are more inclined to share personal details in order to blog what we want to blog.

Arguably certain generations share more of their lives online, especially millennials. According to the 2016 Census, there are around 1.7 million Facebook users between 16-39 years old in Australia and a study found young Australians discover their identities through online interactions. Consequently many millennials are finding new online career ventures appealing: those with a few thousand followers on their social media accounts are branding themselves as social influencers, constantly promoting products and sharing their whereabouts in exchange for a few thousand dollars – a source of income so why not share on social media.

For a moment, sharing might be liberating.

For a moment, sharing might be liberating.

Some of us share our personal lives online to seek validation. According to a study exploring human behaviour and the use of computers, people use Facebook to comfortably express their true selves and to feel a sense of belonging. In other words, some of us share our lives online in hope of finding an honest connection and being a part of something or someone. The more a blogger shares about their personal lives, the more it can bring out their human side and make them more relatable – and hence find an audience.

What we share online is a choice and defines us. However what others post about us on the internet is pretty much impossible to control, and so sometimes it’s hard to control our online image. Our friends, colleagues, family and acquaintances could share a photo or video and tag us in it – which might show up anywhere online regardless of our online privacy settings. This isn’t all that bad: people think of you, you are relatively important to them and they want you to be part of their social media presence. Also, sharing and tagging online is a great way for social influencers to get to know each other and join each other’s networking circles.

We are vulnerable when we share, putting ourselves out there.

We are vulnerable when we share, putting ourselves out there.

For many of us who blog regularly, we blog with a sense of purpose and direction, sharing selectively. For me, what I will post online on this blog are my thoughts on cultural nuances and different perspectives, and we can all learn from each other. I will share, Tweet and link to other blogs and bloggers if there’s a mutual respect for each other and our craft. As bloggers, writers and freelance creatives, sharing our craft online is so easy. But sharing selectively with intent is powerful in a saturated online world. On projecting one’s voice, writer Soumya John writes:

‘A writer’s biggest forte is their truth. We could speak about a lot of things, but nothing would ring better than an honest voice that speaks with courage.’

Some of us will share...and yet will find a way to keep things personal, personal.

Some of us will share…and yet will find a way to keep things personal, personal.

These days some will say we are anti-social if we don’t use or share on social media. But we really shouldn’t have to feel pressured into being active online as our own life is our own life, and talking to each other face-to-face or over text is still a way to keep in touch. Honestly I don’t like using social media very much and have gone days without going on Facebook and Twitter. There are also days where I just do not want to blog and instead sit on the sofa and focus on eating all the snacks that I want.

One’s private life is not everyone’s business. At the end of the day, I love my own space and like my privacy and anonymity, as well as like blending into the background and being a mystery  =D  Drawing a line between my online persona and personal life and keeping each separate is what I want to do. So be it.

How much do you share on social media?

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236 thoughts on “Oversharing: 8 Things I Will Never Post On Social Media As A Blogger

  1. Such a great and thoughtful post! I loved the beautiful photography as well 🙂 I agree with you on most points that oversharing can be dangerous and lead to unwanted attention. We all need to be smart about what we put out onto the internet. As you know, my blog can get quite personal however I feel that it has helped a lot of my family, friends and certain followers so it makes it worthwhile. As you mentioned, it depends on what we use our blogs for. I see mine as therapeutic; an online diary of sorts. I hope my daughter reads some of my inspirational content one day and it strengthens her self love. These days, I am definitely blogging more about one of my biggest passions: books! My reading wrap ups keep me accountable and encourage me to keep diving into new stories. I really respect how you conduct yourself on your blog and what you choose/choose not to share. It is very professional 🙂 cannot wait to see you soon my friend xoxox

    Liked by 1 person

    • What an eloquent and well-phrased comment! We do all need to be smart about putting things online and if we don’t feel comfortable about sharing something, we don’t need to. I really like how you can be so open about certain parts about your life – in a way it helps us self-reflect and others online can help us with our lives too. I love what you share on your blog and your IG – you are so passionate about it and are very honest when it comes to sharing 🙂 Thank you so much Bec. I am very honoured to know such an open-minded, encouraging and supportive friend. Cannot wait to see you soon too my friend xxxx

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  2. Great advice Mabel, especially about keeping personal matters private.
    As you say, for some, it is a requirement to have the work address and even telephone numbers publicly available.
    The geo-tagging point is important. If I shoot something with my mirrorless or DSLR camera, I will geo-tag each file in Adobe Lightroom. It’s the nerdy geek in me. If I shoot something at home with my mirrorless or DSLR camera, I’ll geo-tag a known location that is not my home. A problem arises when I take a snap with my smartphone at home. I need to remember to alter the GPS metadata or remove it from the image file. That’s a real pain when I want to snap something quickly as part of a recipe.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Personal matters will be personal matters and private if we choose to keep it that way. Others should respect that.

      I don’t geo-tag my images, but I do realise that that it makes a photo more recognisable and helps me remember the place. It sounds like you are very across removing the geotags like a pro geek 😀 It’s so easy to forget removing the geo-tag from smartphones especially when you have location GPS turned on – which I rarely ever do.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I like creating maps and seeing where I shot a photo.
        I snapped a few photos tonight with my smartphone and your post reminded me to “fix” the geotags 😃😃😃

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        • The creating maps part sound interesting. Do you actually create real maps? I’ve always had a fondness for geography, coordinates and latitude figures. Hope fixing those geotags weren’t too much of a pain 😃

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          • There is a google map engine, a free version, which allows you to enter a GPS track from a device, e.g., fitness tracker or smartphone. You can then generate a map. There are some WP Plugins which also show a small map associated with a photograph. I’ve disabled them on my blog because they are a bit buggy. It’s fun though.

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            • Thanks for the tip, Gaz. Will Google and have a look…though not sure if I’ll use it. It would be interesting to see where you’ve been 😃 Mapping yourself and retracing your steps – and thoughts – does sound like a lot of fun 😃😃

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  3. I agree with you Mabel…online sharing has to be restricted to the extent that it doesn’t reveal too much of your personal life, profession, phone numbers, address etc. I have come across bloggers who share personal pictures, even of their children and talk freely about their relationships. I have also noticed that most of them are young. Over sharing does have its pitfalls. Your post is a good reminder in these times of data stealing.
    Though my blog is all about emotions and people, I try to keep my thoughts objective. I have made some wonderful friends like you who feel very close to my heart and blogosphere is an awesome place! Love and hugs 🙂 I agree that one’s personal life should be respected but writers have to be on social media to remain in limelight.
    I wonder whether I should delete my pictures from Facebook, which were shared when we didn’t have so much awareness about misuse of social media but I have also heard that they still remain in their domain and don’t really get deleted.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I agree with your sentiments about being careful online, Balroop. It really does baffle me how some share personal pictures so freely and don’t have much thought of who’s looking.

      You do keep your thoughts objective and I think that is what keeps your blog focused, and we know what to expect 🙂 It is so nice to have made friends with you. Firstly I admired who you are for the work you can do, and through that I got to know you 🙂

      I was actually reading up on Facebook and photo licensing. This page covers it quite well:
      https://www.howtogeek.com/304037/does-facebook-own-my-photos/

      Then again, I also heard the photos remain on Facebook’s domain but not sure for how long. Thank you so much for supporting my friend! It is always a pleasure to chat with you 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I am so agreed with you because we should be so careful with whatever we going to share in internet. Just like you have mentioned, it’s good to draw a line between online persona and personal life, selective with what to post.
    As for me, although we are living in modern world in which everyone free to speak, express as well free to write but same time, we should understand the limitation too. And for me, personal information, family, working place, all of them are not for public consumption.

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  5. Very True. Oversharing can be very dangerous ,the whole world will learn about your whole life. Including your enemies. This can even invite thieves to your home as they will know when you are not home.

    Liked by 1 person

    • ‘the whole world will learn about your whole life.’ This is so well said. Your enemies might learn to know you better than your friends who might not use social media all too much.

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  6. I hope I don’t overshare any personal details about my family and circle of friends. I usually give them nicknames online, so that I know who I am referring to but their identities are still anonymous. Every time I upload pictures, I use the location that the picture was taken in – and it’s always after the fact for safety reasons.

    I seriously don’t know how people can share their romantic lives online – I mean, just skating the surface is okay, but sharing it in such a detailed manner would be risky for everyone involved. And oh gosh, I am always biting my lip whenever I read about someone extensively sharing about their children. D=

    Liked by 1 person

    • Giving them nicknames is a good way to protect one’s anonymity. When I write my book, I plan on doing the same for friends whom I want to quote. Unless someone is very close to that person, it’s then unlikely anyone will know who they are.

      Haha, romantic life is too special to me to want to share. Whenever I see people sharing photos of kids online, I am like….how…why…. If it’s on Facebook and the person has only close friends, then well, okay. But if they have a few hundred friends or their family are open to the public..like you I just can’t understand D:

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      • For my book, I told them in advance that I’ll be writing them into the storyline. I didn’t reveal the names that I’d use for them because it’d ruin the surprise, but if they read the manuscript, I’m sure they know which character is based on who.

        What I usually do when I’m writing about them is describe the happening without actually referring to them by name at all.

        There’s also another problem with sharing things online – people would always jump to the assumption that this is this and who is who. I mean, whenever I share posts about an inside joke between me and a friend, people would always think that I’m either in a relationship or the person whom the post is dedicated to is my boyfriend. *facepalm*

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        • It is considerate of you to ask your friends if they wanted to be in your book, and nice of them to say okay. Lol people will always have funny assumptions and jump to conclusions when you write about any kind of intimate relationship. It’s hilarious.

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          • I mean, the characters were based off them, not written about them… maybe that’s the reason why they okayed it.

            In that case, I’ll have to remember not to write anything about a boyfriend if/when I have one. I don’t want to be peppered with questions about how and where we met and etc. I’m guilty of this from time to time too, lol.

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  7. Mabel, I’m glad you brought this topic up. I guess I’m of same school of thought. I see that bloggers share their lives and events because they want to be popular. Nothing wrong with that if that’s their aim but they should not complain later about its repercussions. We all are free to choose what we want but we should make an informed decision. I like the fact that you write on lovely topics which others choose not to touch. 😃

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  8. I agree, Mabel! You got to be very careful with the info you share, especially on the internet. There are some things that I never ever share – like my real time location, where I live, and pics of my son’s face.

    As a foreigner living in Taiwan, it is quite scary when people recognize you and know where you live. For example, when my husband and I moved to our neighborhood, I was approached at the bank by one of the guys who works there and he told me he lived right across from me. And sure enough, he did and after he introduced himself, I saw him all the time.

    I am also very careful with the photos that I share of my son on IG. It is intentional that I share pictures of him from behind or photos of him not looking directly at the camera.

    Hope all is well, Mabel. It is so good to see you still writing and blogging and producing high quality content and thought provoking posts!

    Liked by 1 person

    • It is very thoughtful of you to think twice about what you share online. For you as a foreigner, you must already make an impression in real life like with the guy at the bank. I hope he didn’t end up finding you online.

      It is very nice of you to share photos of your son on IG, but at the same time doing discretely 🙂 It is a strategic way to protect his and your family’s privacy, and also to share a bit of what matters to you.

      Thank you so much for the kind words, Constance. I really like doing this blog, I really do and your support means a lot.

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  9. I used to share my posts on Twitter but it felt repetitive to me and I think all it did was mostly attract spam. I know some bloggers have a Facebook or instagram to go along with their posts but I don’t see the point of that for myself.

    I have shared some things on my blog that may have crossed over into oversharing territory, like talking about my family though I would never share photos of them because that’s just too personal. I don’t have intentions of ever putting my blogging experience on my resume or on linkedin because I feel my style of writing is perhaps not meant for the professional world and I get the sense I may be unfairly perceived because of some of my topics and views expressed on there.

    The times I do share where I am if, I am okay doing it if it’s a high populated public place so I’m just one in the crowd until I leave lol. I have said the city I live in and even gone into semi-detail about a past job I had without giving the business name and also changing the people’s names. It’s good practice to use fake names for people if I reference them on my blog. I didn’t know about the location thing on smartphone photos. Does it still tag the location automatically even if my location on my phone is turned off? I usually don’t have it on unless I am out somewhere and I need it for gps on my map.

    One thing I feel iffy about and still wonder if it’s right for me is I’ve shared pictures of myself infrequently, so it’s not like it’s a front blog page thing but if people really dig through my past posts, they could probably find one or two recent photos of me. Even when I’m at an exciting event, I prefer to take photos of the event’s festivities rather than take a picture of myself.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I also share my posts on Twitter but I take a long time to get around to my Twitter. Twitter is a good way to make business-like connections. But not every social media platform is for us – like how you don’t see the need to have a Facebook or IG for your blog.

      I also think it is too personal to share family photos. The thought doesn’t sit comfortably with me at all :S Your blog is so honest and I admire the way you share your personal experiences with anxiety so honestly. For many who have anxiety, it is already hard enough to put their experiences in words. Maybe you find a connection with writing and that helps you share this personal side of you with us.

      Using fake names is a good way of protecting your friends’ identities if you blog about them. For me, I give my friends fake names on this blog too but I also ask their permission before I write a about them. I’m not sure if the location still tags automatically for smartphone photos if the location is off. I use a Samsung, always with location off and I checked one of my smartphone photos on my computer. Doesn’t look like there are geographic coordinates attached 🙂

      I guess if you rather not have your photos up on the blog, you can always take them down 🙂 But it is nice to put a face to words. Taking photos of festivities is also what I prefer too. Not a huge fan of taking photos of myself too. Maybe it’s an introvert thing.

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      • I agree, talking about anxiety is probably easier for me online because I gravitate towards expressing myself in written words. If I had to do it verbally to a small audience, I would be a mess.

        I do feel a little self-conscious about my photos on my blog, mainly because I do not think I’m attractive or have a nice smile. I know that’s silly because if it were someone else saying this and I was the one reading it, I might feel like the person is being too hard on her/himself because beauty is so subjective.

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  10. I’m with you on all or most of these points. I have on occasion mentioned a child or posted an old photo, but never by full name or any other positive identifiers. For that matter, I’ve never even used my own full name! When Facebook had its data breach recently, I felt pretty much OK because I don’t put private info online anyway. I cringe when I see people answering stupid online questionnaires because it’s so obviously trolling for personal data. Lots of good points you have made here about not oversharing, Mabel!

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    • You are very careful about online safety, Lex! I have mentioned my full name on my blog at some point so you are one up more careful than me. Stupid online questionnaires are stupid, agreed. They ask for you name, age, and then the ball keeps rolling and the next thing before you know it, you’ve given so much of yourself away! I used to to market research surveys online in exchange for gift vouchers (totalling a few hundred dollars) and then stopped because they were time consuming and I wondered really how my data was being used.

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  11. Nicely put :). Yes I’m also cautious about writing things online relating to culture. I recently wrote one on my blog and was nervous about hitting publish!!! It’s a topic I really enjoyed writing about, so maybe I will write more on it.

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  12. I also try to keep certain points which I will never blog/ post about on social media. Sure my blog is mainly about my family but I do not go into any real details regarding how our personal lifes are at all times and I certainly do not have any of those silly “couple pictures”, come to think I believe the only pictures with just us are from the wedding!
    Anyhow I think it is important to keep certain things in life private and so I keep everything on a certain level where no one (except my mother-in-law) will be depicted and written bad about 😀

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  13. This is an important topic, Mabel and I love how you’ve covered it here. What stands out from your words is the idea that what one person considers over sharing, another person may not. And of course, depending on our purpose for being online, we may share more personal information. Security is important and I’m glad you brought that up. No one should know your home address or where you are in ‘real time’. I keep those out of my on line identity as well.

    I have learned first hand, that telling my story as a guest author regarding some family issues, caused a great rift. Even though there was no slander or gossipy information, simply my story…those it involved did not appreciate my sharing it. As a writer, I argue that having a voice, telling our stories is important. It’s what we do. But slanderous, lies and shedding someone in a bad light maliciously, is not. what. we. do.

    Still, our stories may not put someone in a positive light and that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t write about our experiences. We must weigh the consequences though. I recall hearing a quote somewhere “You’re not a real writer until your family hates you.” That made laugh so hard b/c in some ways it is true.

    Social media updates I tend to stay away from as well. I don’t share personal stuff on facebook, just the odd pic of me and my friends or kids. I advise women who are going through a divorce to stay away from talking about their ex and their divorce on line (facebook) unless it’s a private group designed for that purpose. Even then, beware, because privacy is only a word and not a reality. Take the recent breach of privacy on facebook, for example. Great post, Mabel. Just loved reading this and the images were wonderful to accompany the topic. Lots to think about!

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    • Thank you so much for a reflective comment, Lisa. Security is definitely important. It is something so many of us forget about as we get caught up in connecting with each other online and all the fun in that. Wise of you to keep your real time status offline. You just never know who might be watching.

      I am sorry to hear that your story about some family issues wasn’t taken too well by some of those around you. Even if you don’t mention names, others can get offended because they can identify themselves. Hope you got it all sorted with that person/people in the end. Before writing about any of my friends online, even a one-sentence mention and using pseudonyms, I ask them if it’s okay before going ahead.

      That quote is such a great quote. It is certainly worth being careful about talking divorce online, especially if legal proceedings are taking place. Anything you say online (public or private) is considered to put said in writing – which can be used against you. Really lots to think about.

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    • True. Sometimes what you share online and regret sharing online can never be removed. You might be able to remove a post or photo, but it might have been seen by someone and they might not forget about it. Thank you so much for visiting, Leslie. Much appreciated.

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  14. Great post Mabel. It makes me think about how in this day and age, we don’t have a lot of privacy and so knowing that we can choose what to share online is important. I think we should still have a sense of anonymity and leave space for curiosity and mystery 🙂 that makes it more interesting!

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    • Agreed that these days we don’t have a lot of privacy. The world is centred around sharing and interacting with each other, such an extroverted world this is. The less we share online, the more we keep a part of ourselves to us and have more time for ourselves 🙂

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  15. As a writer who posts and otherwise writes memoir (among other genres), sharing may seem like oversharing to others but it is a significant genre I respect and thus work hard at writing. I gave much thought to it long before it occurred to me to just try memoir, as in person I’ve been reserved, reluctant to share my personal life–not at all at work, of course. It takes a long time knowing someone before opening up to much deeper levels of interaction. Part of that has been intentional as I was for decades a mental health counselor; clear and very strong boundaries have been essential.

    But I retired and then wrote daily, at last. I wasn’t convinced I wanted to stick with just fiction and poetry so began to attempt more nonfiction, discovering it at times morphed into memoir. When I took that initial plunge into the form, it was in large part due to many issues culturally that spoke to my personal experiences. Thus, I felt I had something of some value to contribute to the discussions ongoing. I am additionally mindful of writing of others and always ask permission. And it IS risky emotionally and at times otherwise–I accept this as part and parcel of sharing personal stories. In the end, I have found reading and writing memoir engaging and entertaining. I do learn much from both my writing of memoir and exploring others’ frequently fine, intensely personal work. It is one way to connect powerfully with the rest of humankind, to know we often share similar feelings and events and are in this together.
    …Gosh, this is perhaps become a bit of memoir, itself. 🙂

    Thank you for an interesting post, Mabel. I appreciate all you remind us of re: social media. Well done.

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    • You bring up a great point, that writing a memoir might be considerd oversharing. After all, that genre really is about one’s personal life and often pretty much the entirety of their lives. For some of us writers, we might be able to express our honest thoughts about the world by sharing our personal thoughts and hence find the memoir genre appealing. True, there are boundaries when it comes to sharing and interacting. There needs to be a degree of trust between you and the person you are engaging with before you have deep conversations and reflections with one another.

      Sounds like you fell into each genre the more you wrote. ‘one way to connect powerfully with the rest of humankind, to know we often share similar feelings and events and are in this together’ You said this so well about sharing personal stories, and you wrote yourself such a good quote 🙂 I agree. My first book will be a non-fiction memoir of sorts and I hope my stories will inspire others. It will most certainly incorporate conversations from others and like you, I will be asking permission, and also using pseudonyms (I already do this with most people who appear in my blog posts). But if someone doesn’t want to be apart of it, then that’s okay.

      Thank you so much for an insightful comment, Cynthia. I really appreciate it a lot 🙂

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      • Thank you for another response, Mabel. I am, however,
        not averse to striking up a conversation with a stranger, even, about important topics or exchanging some personal info.
        We also do it on this site every day…and such conversations can at times be the most revealing of human experience and, thus, fascinating! The boundaries I was referring to are those required for a truly ethical practice in professional counseling environments, primarily. 🙂 But I think we all have flexibility as our sharing is situational.

        It seems to me that you are already writing memoir–always nonfiction–by sharing your first hand experiences of many sorts, addressing many personal opinions and sharing insights you have gained along the way. It seems popular to do so in WordPress and nonfiction is well appreciated in the publishing world. I was surprised that my nonfiction has garnered readers’ attention–I used to write and love fiction and poetry more–and has been published in print elsewhere. So we learn as we go,
        Best of good fortune to you with future writing and goal of publishing a book!

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  16. You know it’s funny, Mabel – I am an extremely private person. I did not grow up with social media, nor did my girls really – they are in their mid to late thirties, so MySpace and/or Facebook were really just emerging during their high school years. And I’m glad of it, for they are private people.

    I am horrified to see things people share on Facebook about their kids, because these kids have no say in the matter. It seems like for each emotion, each meal, each action in these kids’ lives, a phone camera is pointed at them. This creeps me out. Naked baby photos or photos of a toddler with makeup on might be cute to the parents, but I shudder to think what some pervert might be doing with these images. A kid throwing a tantrum might be funny to some, but each time this is captured and shared, the parent/s are taking a little more liberty from their child. Is that really what they wish for them?

    I occasionally post things to my blog that I have discovered about myself in order that others might not feel so alone in their own deep spaces. Whether poetry or prose, I am moved to share insights at this time in my life; things I don’t think I could have or would have shared in my earlier years. So this kind of sharing might be one of those things that goes either way, some would do it, some would not. I counseled people for decades, and the best I could do was to share my own experiences so they knew a)they were not alone and b)they could survive most anything and even learn from it.

    Great post, as always – you do think of great subjects to ponder. Aloha ❤

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    • Good to hear that you are a private person and know it. You said it: ‘these kids have no say in the matter.’ Even if someone is sharing their kids on their private Facebook, it’s baffling to me. You just never know who might be looking, who might be screenshotting that image and where the image can be distributed. Once I heard the phrase humans forget, so they take photos in order to relive moments. This I can agree with, but when it comes to taking care of someone dependent including kids, having a camera or phone in front of them at all times isn’t practical. Some moments you just need to watch out for others with just yourself and these moments are meant to be lived. I wonder what happens when a kid grows up and looks back on their baby images of them posted online. In the Instagram world, I have come across quite a few parents setting up Instragram accounts for their kids, controlling these accounts themselves and posting their photos there for the world to see.

      Sharing something so that others won’t feel alone and find a hope of light is such a powerful thing to do. If someone wants to share because of that, why not. I do like how you weave your personal thoughts in quite a few of your poems, Bela. They always give me food for thought about life in general be it positive or negative times – which I have so much to learn from you 🙂

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  17. I agree with all your points. I would like think that I don’t share that much on social media. Then it some strange time we are living in these days. Even though we do what we can to try to keep our lives private, there this “digital force” wanting us to conform to the new digital word we live in.

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    • So true there is this ‘digital force’ that is forcing us to go online and interact online. It’s the case with many workplaces. Also many restaurants are pushing for online takeout delivery these days. The world is changing so fast.

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  18. Some aspects of your life ought to be personal, some can still be made public – one is the best judge of him/herself.

    I don’t mind talking about my company and profile…it can get you a job too when you are looking for a change. But I have seen that showing happiness on social media is often taken as ‘it’s all good in your life while mine is a mess.’ A relative even called my mother saying we do so many travels and that we are so happy. Well, not exactly! So Saru has not even gone on FB since last few months because of that…we felt quite awkward hearing this about relative!

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  19. I am with you on the blogging part. I do use a social media account to keep informed with my relatives and friends who live overseas though. I always do “late post” even for the Story part. About showing off the private life including partner and kids, I guess it is all started from those reality shows. Now that we have celebrities whose being famous just because they show off inside out of their lives, such as the Kardashians and perhaps it is like a natural thing to do for some people to show their personal life to the public.Maybe. Actually, I am not sure anymore why some people seem at ease to disclose their personal life…I guess it is also related to the needs to get acknowledged.

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    • It is interesting for you to link online sharing with reality TV shows. Could possibly be a connection because these kinds of shows essentially portray lives out in the open and how to be a public persona that can be looked up to. Then again, as you said each of us have different needs. Maybe some of us just want to share online to keep others who matter informed of our lives, or maybe they want to make a connection with the wider world. Thank you so much, Indah. thoughtful as always.

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  20. A topical post Mabel! Treat yourself to a burger and fries this weekend on a job well done 🙂 I have to thank my reserved nature for being very cautious about sharing on social media. I rarely if at all post on Fb mostly because I am not overly fond my mug and prefer to stick to trees who (apparently dont have privacy issues) until they file a case against me 😀 Cheers!

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  21. Hello dear Mabel! What a timely and excellently written post. As a memoir writer, I am mindful of the tricky area of sharing personal things on a blog, but knowing I barely scratch the surface there, I keep well within my perimeters, sharing only exactly what I need to and am at liberty to do so. I have always felt uncomfortable with sharing immediate location on FB and never have, like you. Why do I want the world to know where I am at that given moment? For one thing, I am of the mindset that nobody is THAT interested in me and what I’m doing! And isn’t it nice not to be bound by those rules set by whoever it is that sets them…if you want to eat snacks and not blog or write or go on FB or Twitter, then go for it! I don’t blog at the weekends, never have, and that’s just the way I like it. I hope your writing is going well and life is treating you well also, sweet friend…always lovely to read you. Take care and have a lovely weekend and see you again soon! 🙂 ❤ 🙂

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    • The memoir genre does seem tricky when it comes to sharing. Good to know you know where to draw the line. Maybe if someone was desperate for attention they’ll share their status online. I am sure people are interested in you, Sherri. But not for where you are but who you are and what you share through your writing 🙂 You can be anywhere and yet still make people feel better through selective online sharing. Good to hear you have a life on weekends and enjoy it all 🙂 Life has been busy for me but I see that your SummerHouse is open, so hopefully I will be able to pop by soon. Take care and stay safe ❤

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  22. Mabel you have provided some very solid advice about online safety here and tips well worth taking by all. As a blogger it can be a delicate balance between engaging an audience and not sharing so much as to create safety concerns. Working with companies they are looking for high engagement and genuine posts but of course this needs to be balanced. As always you have given myself and your audience much to reflect on. Thank you!

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  23. This is a great reminder that one must be extremely cautious online. I think there are three types of bloggers: one, who’s wary of sharing anything apart from the subject s/he is writing about; two, whose life is an open chapter sharing everything they deem fit; and three, those who take the middle path. I consider myself riding the center lane. I do write about family when I feel like. Yes: where I am real time, where I work, my address or phone number, names of family members, etc. will never be made public. Having said this, I have problems with people who “judge” those who share their personal lives, saying they do it because they want to be famous or get more hits, that it’s horrible and “I can never do it,” etc. Passing judgment you’ll agree is uncalled for and I know it might hurt those whose blogging doctrine itself is sharing who and what they are. To each his own, Mabel, and I’m sure bloggers understand and are ready to face the consequences if something awry were to happen because of their actions.

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  24. Excellent Mabel 🙂 I have a few online accounts, FB, Instagram, and Twitter as well as my blog. I try not to put too much personal stuff on although I am guilty of ‘Checking In’ on Facebook – especially if I’m at a nice restaurant or great gig. I do not like to put up a truckload of selfies and if I am followed by a site that is made up solely or majorly with selfies, I am reluctant to follow back. I am fine with sharing my relationship status, probably because I am happy to let people know that we have been happily married for 22 years :). I am always wary about posting pics of friends and family for exactly the reasons you speak of.
    I don’t consider myself to be anti-social for spending time on social media and like you I am happy to share stuff I think will interest of am proud of. I also like to sit at home with my wife while she reads and I play xBox 😀 … and there are usually snack involved and cups of tea 🙂

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    • It sounds like you are very well-versed in the online sphere, Andy. I am sure you are capable of putting up a truckload of selfies if you really wanted to 😀 If you are proud of your relationship and want to share it, go for it. If your partner is happy and okay with that, then she is 😀

      Always good to have snacks around. Even when I am chatting on social media or blogging, most of the time I will have a snack of drink with me 😀😀😀

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  25. An excellent post, Mabel. Social media certainly has its pros and cons. What you say here about sharing work-related information and not getting into online arguments is wise.

    I read recently that in the near future the visa application process to visit America may include scrutiny of the applicant’s last 5 years of social media activity.

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  26. Thank you. I agree with practically everything you say in this post, and that comment comes from someone will not even use their real name on their blog. Of course, Mabel Kwong may be a fake name as well – please don’t confirm or deny that.

    Even in real life, some people share too much, that’s a personality issue. Somehow, social media loosens people’s tongues even more. Think of all those who are quick to condemn on Facebook and Twitter, and the resultant stories about suicides as a result of that bullying. I know employers may even check employees and potential employees social media accounts.

    Of course, identity theft and stalking are other issues you mention. And then there are those who post private details (or invented private details) for possible financial gain – e.g. I have cancer, please send me money for treatment.

    I completely agree with keeping a certain level of privacy, and can be wary of those who share too much.

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    • No, thanks Dragon for this reflective, well-thought out comment. Dragon is such a cool name, Strong, powerful, mighty yet mythical and mysterious 😀

      ‘social media loosens people’s tongues even more.’ Spot on. It’s like someone had too much to drink yet are fully aware of what they are doing at the same time. I also heard employers check social media accounts to check out one’s personality to see if they will be a good cultural fit.

      You can make up anything on the internet, and as you said, it’s possible for people to invent private details for some kind of gain. If I were to share a place that I was visiting, I’d do it after I have gotten back – like how you take your time to post your photography from travels 🙂

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  27. I do enjoy reading posts of bloggers who are open and share their thoughts and lives. Without some sharing and openness, a post can seem dull and cold. But you’re right, as bloggers we must be selective.

    I’m retired, so I don’t need to worry about revealing information about a job. But I do have to be careful not to reveal anything about my children’s jobs, all of which have confidential aspects. Likewise, I don’t publish current pictures of my children and grandchildren. I do use photos of them taken when they were babies or young children. It’s tempting to include current photos of them in travel photos. People are more interesting than simple scenery.

    I don’t like gossip, slander, and arguments in real life. I certainly wouldn’t want to include any of that in a blog.

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    • Have to agree with you that without sharing some anecdote, a blog post can be hard to connect with. People, love and family are a big part of our lives and they can pretty much shape our every day. So it can always be tempting to share about them. I always found your blog very relatable from what you share. It’s great that you respect your children’s and grandchildren’t privacy.

      Gossip, slander and arguments really just bring your blog and profile down in my opinion, and that can happen overnight – and then you lose hard work which might have taken years to build up. Best to avoid.

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  28. I agree pretty much with Nicki. I’m probably a gullible idiot. I wouldn’t share obvious stuff like credit details, but hey… you’ve read my blog. My photos etc are wide open to theft. If they have nothing better to do with their lives…? I won’t bad mouth or intentionally upset anyone but I do kind of blaze my emotions around the place. That’s just me. 🙂 🙂 Or rather, it’s the ‘me’ that people perceive from my online presence. There’s a difference, isn’t there?

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  29. I think we are of the same mind when it comes to blogging Mabel. I rarely share any personal information, especially photos of my loved ones or information about their lives – that’s for them to decide in terms of how much to share with the world. I’ve been amazed when I google myself at how many of my photographs show up on others’ websites. In the beginning it really bothered me but now I just take it as a compliment and move on. There will always be people who abuse the system and while I always include my copyight on my photos that’s no guarantee others won’t use them. As far as I know, no one but me is earning any income from them and that’s what really matters. For me it’s a creative outlet for something that I love and that’s my blog’s sole purpose. I admire your ability to examine an emotional subject and love seeing your thoughts and those of your followers!

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    • Totally agree with you that it’s up to others to decide of how much they want to share of themselves with the world. It’s their lives, not ours.

      It is nice to hear you see the positive side to your photos showing up all over the internet. Your photographs do touch others. One time I put one of my concert photos up online with my watermark and someone cropped it out. Lol just can’t win and like you, though it wasn’t a nice feeling I just moved on, Karma will come around.

      This was such a fun topic to write about. Hopefully more broader topics like these at some point again 🙂

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  30. It’s easy to get to that point when you shared something that you wish you hadn’t after it’s already out there. I did that one and it quickly sharpened my deliberation as to what I should and shouldn’t discuss anywhere in cyberspace.

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    • When you share something online, it is out there and who knows who has seen it, where it has gone and where it is kept. Good to know you are clear on your boundaries on what you want to share and not share online.

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  31. Thank you for another thoughtful article, Mabel! I especially liked your point not to share disagreements. It’s hard to predict how random readers may take or interpret one’s written statements or opinions, and people do a good job sometimes of overlaying their own emotional biases onto what one has written, no matter how carefully you try to phrase it so as not to be misconstrued. But if you then react defensively and escalate the emotional disagreement it becomes even more hurtful. (Not that one shouldn’t take a stand or protect against cruel, racist or misogynistic opinions.) I’m sorry to hear you’ve been the target of hurtful accusations, and it’s surprising, knowing how thoughtful and respectful your writing is. 🙂 Thanks!

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  32. I get what you mean. We’re so similar. 🙂 I find it hard sharing anything at all. Sometimes its hard to write how I feel. It’s taken me a lot of time to get over that. 🙂 I am not very active on other social media platforms and my friends are very surprised that I blog.
    I guess some bloggers share about their lives to stay connected with family an friends back home. It’s the case for many bloggers who are living or working outside their home country.
    I knew 2 bloggers who had some problems with stalkers online. It’s scary. It’s nice that you wrote a post on this subject. It makes so much sense given the times we live in.
    Have a greta week ahead! And stay warm. xo

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    • ‘Sometimes its hard to write how I feel. It’s taken me a lot of time to get over that’ This is so me as well! Even today I struggle so much with that…so much so I can’t even put my feelings into words most of the time, let alone share that on social media.

      Personally I see your blog as more travel-focused as opposed to more than a travel diary. Maybe that’s why you share what you share online, and there is a distance between that and your personal life 🙂

      Stalkers are no fun and they can be persistent. Always worth thinking twice about what we share online. You have a great week ahead too 🙂

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  33. I don’t know what I would consider oversharing. I have been sharing photos of myself with people online since I was 13 (no, I didn’t run into any pedophile, hehe, I just chatted with people when the internet was still not commonly used) so I’m pretty comfortable with that. Of course, I only share normal pictures, I was never so stupid as to consider anything else. I haven’t posted anything on Facebook in years, though, I just feel lazy to use it, and I never really got into Twitter. My Instagram is open but I have never had anyone recognising me, haha.

    I don’t really like when people constantly share their selfies or pictures of their kids, but mostly because I think it’s boring. I know some people are worried about “those baby pictures will still be around when the kid grows up” but I think the probabilities of someone digging up your mom’s instagram and publishing your pictures of 20 years ago are pretty low. Also, don’t really think they will really ruin anyone’s career xD

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    • Lol if you have shared anything stupid online you would probably have made the news and be famous by now – for instance sharing a million photos of you in a bikini, a photo of yourself train surfing or feeding your dog 100 boxes of pizza XD

      I also feel lazy to use social media, and Messenger and IG are sort of about it for me. Lol, parents who share their photos of children might come after you for saying those photos are boring XD But I can’t help but agree to an extent because I like to look at different things online.

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  34. A pertinent post Mabel. While some of this has to do with personal preference and personality, I agree that there are lines that shouldn’t be crossed. My blog is quite personal, but I will never reveal family or other secrets or details about my relationships, etc. A blog isn’t a diary, and many things *should* remain private… As a matter of fact, I have struggled with how many pictures of family to post, etc. My nephew is about to turn one, and I would like to write about being an aunt and his cystic fibrosis, etc., but my brother and sister-in-law are pretty much keeping him “offline.” I understand and respect this. It’s definitely a fine line.

    The crazy thing about this day and age is that it seems the Internet already has a lot of our information. A quick google search and you can often find names of people’s family members, their previous addresses, their age, their occupation, and much more. *That* scares me.

    Honestly, another thing that feels like oversharing to me is when people post pictures of their food. I see it more in some cultures that others, and, while it may not cause any real harm, I can’t help but wonder: Who *cares* what you ate? I mean, I get it when it’s a special meal or someone prepared something very nice, but… every meal? Sometimes it’s just too much!

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    • It is a fine line on what we should and shouldn’t share online and ultimately it is up to the individual on what they want to share. I’ve alway thought your blog to be quite personal, especially when it came to your rock climbing, accident and Taiwan teaching experiences. That was what got me hooked on to your blog initially, apart from the emotional writing. These days you seem to write more about the monologues in your head and ponder life in general at more of a distance – which I am equally enjoying.

      True. We can find so many things about others online, and it’s getting harder and harder to completly do away with an online presence. That scares me too…and to be honest I’ve re-thought what I’ve been sharing on this blog and my private social media accounts a lot.

      Haha, occasaionally I post photos of food on my private IG. To me, I see this kind of sharing more as an art form…I cooked the food, I plated it on the plate and hope to enjoy the food or hope others enjoying my cooking. Then there are those who literally share every meal they eat – and in a way I see that as showing off one’s status and privilege.

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  35. It’s a really touchy subject, isn’t it? I find myself trying to strike the right balance. When I was in Cambodia, I didn’t change my job status on FB; that is, I didn’t update it. On Twiter, my time zone is an American one. And I just discovered my phone has this interesting privacy setting that hides my location and time zone! But sometimes I think, who am I kidding, the government can find me if they really want. 😛

    As far as social media is concerned and my blog, I see it as being watched. In other words, I have to be mindful of what I say because “anyone and everyone’s watching”. This is real for me because I’ve become FB friends with a lot of my former students so I don’t post party pics or make crude jokes, none of which I’d normally do, but with my student audience, I’m careful.

    Also with the countries I’ve chosen to live in, I have to be very much aware of what I say. The repercussions of saying the wrong thing is quite serious, too.

    But overall, I don’t mind self-censoring. I feel like you have to – especially these days when it is all too easy to overshare, react, fight back, get angry or whatever without what normally would have been an opportunity to reflect or pause. I feel like people say crazy things online because they feel protected and removed from real people and their feelings. The old playground rules still apply: be kind and be nice!

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    • Lol that is an interesting privacy setting on your phone. Wonder if all phones have it though I’m guessing it’s probably your phone or certain phones from a certain region. Agree with you that having a blog and participating on social media essentially means you are being watched. With the friends you have, you do have to keep up an image of sorts because you have an influential role to some of them – and they might look up to you as a role model 😛

      Social media often allows us freedom of speech but you are so right in saying it’s worth watching what you say online. You just don’t know who is watching and listening and might share what you say with undesirable outcomes. The online world can just be as real as the offline world, but so much more room for miscommunication and misinterpretation. Some might feel there is a facade to hide behind while you are online, but with technology and the ease with which one can access your IP address anyone can find you.

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      • Right. And even though I’ve tried to be careful about not naming apt buildings I’ve lived in or where I work publicly, people figure it out! It can be a little scary.

        To be honest though, I’m more weirded out by mommy bloggers who upload photos of their kids with complete ease and freedom. I can take responsibility for what I post about me, but children who can’t do anything on their own yet have full profiles online already.

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        • People are smarter than you think. It’s why I hesitate to post up photos of the view outside of my apartment because you never know who can guess where you live.

          I wonder when those children grow up just how they will react to their growing up photos being all over the internet. That would never sit well with me.

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  36. This is such a relevant post, Mabel! I often find that my Facebook reads include statuses about very intimate details and I have been surprised by more than one of them. Oversharing is happening on likely every social media network. Good for you for restricting what you write, not only for your safety – yes, they can track us and maybe even break into our houses! – but also so that you keep those things dear to you extra special by only sharing them with those closest to you, if anyone at all. ♥

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    • It can be surprising to know what others don’t mind sharing. Each to their own. You are so right. Keeping somethings offline can make them extra special – they ARE extra special just for the special few ❤

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  37. I’m also really paranoid about sharing real time locations. (or about NOT sharing them). I’m also paranoid about sharing about my family, my parents have sometimes commented on my blog and I deleted their surnames from the comment just so that my blog cant be tracked down to the real me… Everything you write here is complete common sense for people that arent in the spotlight. However other “bloggers” seem to make a living out of sharing absolutely everything! I hope you are doing well Mabel xx

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    • It sounds like you are doing very well keeping your true identity a secret from the online world. A lot of it really is common sense but sometimes you look at what others share and think otherwise. Not too bad over here. Hope you are doing good Sofia xxx

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  38. Bingo! I also feel that it doesn’t make sense to share anything and everything on the social media or blog. Particularly the real-time location. Those FB updates of so & so have checked into so & so place are so irritating and so is going overboard on PDA with boyfriend, partner or spouse. Gossips and disagreements..well most of the media engages in that. So it can be left best to them. Personal Details ..never.
    Enjoyed reading your views on oversharing. Mabel.

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    • I also agree FB updates can be annoying, and we don’t need to know about every single detail of someone else’s lives. PDA sometimes I think people share that because they are proud of their partner and what him/her stands for. But at the same time some things are best left private and extra special. Always appreciate it when you stop by, Somali.

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  39. Excellent post, Mabel!! Great share, by the way! And truth be told I just about follow the guidelines you do. It is too easy these days for anyone to find you if they really wanted to. I am as careful as I can be. I NEVER tell anyone where I am going real time. Always after the fact, as in some of my posts I state where the picture was taken on what date. But that is as far as I go. Hubby is very nervous when I do post about him so I do so minimally and only with his permission. My family I do not post about at all. When I was going through massive pain when my Mother died I did say some things out of grief about family who did not treat me well at all. But later on I went back and deleted those words. I don’t believe in bad-mouthing anyone, epically online. If I have something to say to someone, I will do so in a personal way. I do not share too much of my personal life, only at times when my Heart guides me to and only when I feel strongly others can learn from what I am writing about. For the longest time, years in fact, I never published my picture. Only lately I’ve done that. As for social media, I only do WP. Emails …. very restricted and not encouraged. I have LIFE to live and sometimes just squeezing in the time to get the photographs I do and then editing them, plus creating a post, well that’s very time-consuming. I try to be not online too much at one time. Besides I honestly have problems sitting too long so when my body says enough, I listen. I really have a busy life and it is so important for me to take ME time out as well. So there you have it! Smart girl, you are!! I applaud you! 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼

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    • You really are smart, Amy. Nothing to be ashamed of if we choose to keep a discrete online facade. I think it is a nice touch to actually put the date and the location of where your photos of taken after you’ve come back – it serves as a reminder of where you’ve been and we can all share in where you’ve been.

      It is lovely of you to respect Hubby’s privacy and it sounds like he keeps you grounded 🙂 Family can be tricky when it comes to social media. Some family members do like to share on a lot of ups and down, while some don’t. I agree with your sentiments; I too don’t believe in bad-mouthing anyone. Sometimes we might do it in a fit of emotion but we are all human.

      You are right. Photography and post-processing takes up so much time and it’s important to rememer to go out there and live life. So live life, Amy. Go out and take your photos and we will be here when you get back. Move your body, move your mind and heart and feel anew. Take care xxx

      Liked by 1 person

      • Wow you picked up the fact hubby keeps me grounded. Incredible! He is “heavy” energy-wise and there are times this truly comes in handy because I being an “empath” at times feels too much and rely on him to anchor me. No joke. May you have a really wonderful day today, dear friend!! 🌷

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  40. Such an excellent post Mabel. All valid points. It is a scary world we venture into when online. You have your precautions set well. I especially never turn on location on my phone or any other device. Big brother is everywhere! 🙂 xx

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  41. You pretty well summed up the matters that need not be shared online. There are things that are best kept private because some things are just so precious to be made available for anyone’s consumption, and publishing some info can pose security risks. Some thoughts and words and knowledge need also be kept private, not only because they can haunt back the publisher, but more importantly, those words and thoughts can sow division and animosity and ruin reputations. I think that unnecessarily divulging information to generate views and likes is a counterproductive and does not give the publisher honor and respect.

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    • You said it. If we share very, very freely, ‘those words and thoughts can sow division and animosity and ruin reputations’. There is something special about keeping some things private and sharing them with the ones who care you about you. These things are very precious, and very lucky we are to have them. Always appreciate your visit here, Imelda 🙂

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  42. Great post, Mabel, I think the topic of this post should be a mandatory class for children. Sometimes, I think people can get caught up with emotions while writing and sharing on a computer, and press “publish” before truly thinking about the end result. When I started blogging, I actually had a company I work with ask me about this and the potential risks ~ I appreciated their candor, partly I told them because it meant at least one person was reading my blog 🙂

    But you hit the nail on the head when discussing the risks and dangers of over-sharing. The internet has a very long memory and some memories are best kept to oneself. The protocol you outline is very insightful, and I think it is always good to breathe a bit, think about if sharing so much is necessary. It is sometimes the most difficult thing to do, becoming insightful on your own work/post – and whether you’re oversharing or not. Wishing you a great weekend ahead, look forward to seeing all your oversharing photos and stories on Monday 🙂

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    • You are very kind with your words. Thank you. It is nice that you work showed interest in your blogging and were curious about potential risks, and perhaps potential conflict of interests of sorts (which seems to be taken very seriously in Australian workplaces these days). Luckily my work and blog are very distinct. Maybe your work place at that time were thinking you might turn out be an uber successful blogger and might run away from them at some point 🙂

      You said this so well: ‘It is sometimes the most difficult thing to do, becoming insightful on your own work/post’ and as you said, it can be applied to life in general and as you reflect on your individual self and choices that you make. You don’t just reflect on what you do and share, but you reflect on what you just did, how it came about, the memories and what it all means to you. Always love it when you write, Randy. Always so insightful. You take care too and enjoy wherever you are 🙂

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      • I think you are correct with work, companies really take any conflict of interest or potential risk seriously and wanted me to remain off of social media as much as possible 🙂

        What you put out in social media does reflects directly on you, and the danger is that you cannot take it back…a bad mood, a careless typo and it is out there. The scary part of social media and oversharing. That said, social media is awesome in its reach and ability to enact change…more power in the hands of the people. Wish you well Mabel 🙂

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        • In a way, if we use it, social media is literally our resume to the world. Every thing you publish, every like you make and anything you say online others can judge and in reality, it is a reflection of you. But if used sensibly, it is a powerful tool. Take care, Randy 🙂

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